A casual weekend evening, so let’s talk about something related to women. Nothing too long.
For ease of understanding, let’s call this “The Evolution of Little Sparrow.”
Little Sparrow is actually a very distant younger cousin of mine. Precisely because the connection is so distant, her family’s financial situation was worlds apart from my other relatives nearby.
But her parents, knowing that I had built considerable expertise in destiny reading and understood something about raising a person well, asked her — right as she came of age — to occasionally seek my guidance on important life decisions.
Being a family request, I couldn’t refuse. It wasn’t intensive mentorship by any measure, but the critical turning points in a young woman’s growth — I made sure to illuminate each one clearly for her.
To be honest, in terms of family background alone, I doubt anyone reading this had it worse than she did: her father retired early due to a workplace injury, living on a pension of a few thousand yuan; her mother worked part-time as a supermarket cashier, because she also had to care for her husband at home; in Shanghai, they had a single room of roughly 18 square meters — no other assets whatsoever.
Yet this girl — average in looks, unremarkable in natural talent — through years of guidance from me and her own relentless effort, has become a woman who married well, built a distinguished career, and carries herself in a way that gives absolutely no hint of where she came from.
To this day, she shows up at my door every holiday with generous gifts, out of gratitude.
So think about it: if I could bring out this kind of result in a girl like her, I believe that with your own intelligence and circumstances, you should be able to do at least as well.
Looking back on her education, there were several key points worth every woman learning from — regardless of age.
1 — For women, serious study is non-negotiable. Get into the best school you possibly can.
I have particular contempt for the hollow platitudes that so much self-help content feeds young women these days. For a young girl — especially one from a humble background — there is really only one thing that matters enough to change your fate.
Study hard. Get into the best school within your reach. Nothing matters more than this.
Because for someone with an ordinary or even struggling background, education is not merely about knowledge. Through your scores, it becomes the one tool powerful enough to draw a hard line — and hold it — between you and the worse social circles you were born into.
And for a girl specifically: if your university is mediocre, you start at least two full rungs below your peers. Those two rungs could cost you a decade or more to climb once you enter the working world.
So especially for a girl from a poor family — when you have no other cards to play, a good university and a strong academic record are your hardest assets. The moment you step into society, they lift you above your parents’ modest social standing and open doors to entirely different resources.
2 — For women, the foundation of a good marriage is rich dating experience.
Never be foolish enough to think that the first man you fall for in your youth must be your destined one. That feeling is your adolescent hormones making impulsive decisions for you.
A woman should spend time with many capable men. As long as you keep yourself safe, compare widely, observe carefully, and communicate freely. Only after reviewing enough men will you truly understand how they think — and how to tell real quality from a polished facade.
Why do the women who marry well end up with husbands who are responsible, driven, loyal, and steady? Because they’ve seen enough to recognize the real thing the moment it appears. Women with limited exposure, on the other hand, are the easiest targets for men who look good on the surface but have nothing underneath.
3 — A girl from a poor family must completely overhaul her mindset.
The biggest disadvantage a girl from a poor family carries is this: your foundational outlook on life was inherited from your parents — and if your parents are this poor, it means their thinking and behavior are essentially shaped by a loser’s mentality.
Don’t hate them. Don’t resent them. But do choose to give yourself a major upgrade.
The way to do it: ask yourself honestly — across your whole life so far, have you gotten what you wanted? What did you miss? Why did it slip away? Look carefully at who around you has gotten those things, and copy them shamelessly, learn from them deliberately, imitate them closely.
It can’t be helped — if your parents couldn’t provide you with a solid foundation of thinking, then you’ll have to buy it with bruises and thick skin.
4 — A woman must pour real effort into uncovering every dimension of her potential — intellect, magnetism, and strategic thinking.
Remember this: you are not starting from nothing. You yourself are your greatest asset and your most powerful card to play.
As I often say, a smart woman runs herself like a publicly listed company — investing in her mind, her spirit, and her body without slacking in any dimension. Blunt as this sounds, a smart woman examines and refines every facet of herself with meticulous care.
Some women — you know the moment you lay eyes on them that they’ve won at life.
What’s their secret? Did they inherit vast wealth from their parents? Did their husbands hand them a golden mountain?
No. A woman who only knows how to spend money is no winner.
A winner is the kind of woman who operates herself as a living asset — serene and elegant on the surface, razor-sharp and clear-eyed within.
5 — A woman must understand the unpredictability of fate — and learn to ride its waves.
When you’re genuinely no less capable than others, yet forced to take twice as many wrong turns simply because your parents were mediocre, timid, or defeated — there will always be a quiet undercurrent of bitterness. Not bitterness toward your parents exactly, but toward fate itself.
That’s entirely natural. Just don’t let it become self-destruction.
A woman must truly grasp what it means that fate is unpredictable. Because when you’ve seen enough and lived broadly enough, you’ll witness a once-proud princess reduced, years later, to surviving on charity.
And you’ll also witness a girl who started even lower than you — who, through years of grinding struggle, carved out a kingdom that most men couldn’t rival.
Life really is sometimes stranger than fiction. Live long enough, and you’ll see everything.
Life is a song, and life is a stage — every woman’s fate holds its own blessings and its own trials. The question is who learns to court the good and deflect the harm, and who develops true clarity about their own fortune.
A working familiarity with traditional Chinese wisdom — even a modest engagement with Chinese metaphysics (玄学) — is something the most accomplished and well-positioned women today universally share.
Among those who come to consult me on their destiny chart, half are remarkable women — women who want to take command of their own fate while also guiding the fortune of their entire family.
These women can weather the fiercest storms and absorb the sharpest reversals. Because they know exactly where their Chi fortune (气运) and destiny framework (格局) are headed.